98% of Couples Argue During Renovations – Here’s How to Finish the Process Still in Love

Renovating or building a home is often described as one of the biggest tests a relationship can face. One partner dreams of a magazine-worthy kitchen, while the other just wants to stick to the budget. One spends hours picking the perfect light fixtures, the other just wants it all to be over already. So how do you get through the chaos without falling apart—and maybe even come out stronger?

By Maya Sheinberger | 05.08.24

When Renovation Turns Into a Battlefield

“I got a call from a furniture store once: ‘You need to speak to your clients right now—they’re in the middle of the showroom yelling at each other. If they don’t calm down, I’m calling the police.’” This isn’t a scene from a movie—it really happened.

“It’s more common than you’d think,” says interior designer Maya Sheinberger, who specializes in minimalist design. “Renovation stirs up a lot of emotions, especially when each person is envisioning something completely different.”

But do all couples fight during a renovation? “Not at all,” Maya assures. “Still, it’s an intense process that pulls people out of their comfort zones, especially if they’re unfamiliar with the details, unable to visualize the final result, and working within budget constraints. My role isn’t just to design, but to bring clarity and create a structured process that helps couples navigate the renovation in peace.”

Turning Chaos Into a Clear Process

“The key to a successful renovation begins well before selecting flooring,” Maya explains. “Every project I take on starts with a detailed brief—couples fill out a questionnaire outlining their needs, dreams, budget, and fears. This helps them surface what really matters and spot potential friction points early on.”

“During our first meeting, I come prepared with images and ideas to help us make thoughtful decisions and define the project vision,” she adds. “This stage helps us understand what success looks like for each client, what their dealbreakers are, and how to design the best possible solutions for their lifestyle.”

When Reality Hits the Ground

Once construction begins, that’s when the real challenges appear. “Contractors on site, unexpected issues, timeline delays—these things create tension,” says Maya. “That’s why I stay in constant contact with contractors and suppliers, overseeing execution and addressing problems before they escalate.”

But the best way to avoid surprises? Thorough planning. “I spend a lot of time in the planning phase, coming to meetings with multiple options that balance functionality and budget,” she says. “I always encourage clients to take their time with big decisions—sleep on it if needed. Good design can’t be rushed.”

How to Handle Setbacks and Tough Choices

“There are always deviations from the plan—always,” Maya notes. “The question is how you handle them. Two things help avoid disappointment:

1. Detailed planning and realistic visualizations – When couples can see what their future home will look like, there’s far less room for surprises or letdowns.

2. Choosing the right contractors and suppliers – Beyond price quotes and contracts, I always vet for experience, speak to references, and make sure there’s a good fit between expectations and what can actually be delivered. A cheap contractor without the right experience can quickly turn the dream into a nightmare.”

So… How Do You Make Both Dreams Come True?

“One couple wanted a luxurious hotel-style suite, while the other dreamed of a large bathtub with an open view,” Maya shares. “How do you balance competing dreams? That’s where thoughtful planning comes in—understanding each person’s needs, thinking about the future, and finding solutions that bridge their visions with reality.”

“When couples are fully involved and understand that this is a shared home, renovation stops being a stressful challenge and becomes an empowering joint experience.”

Maya’s Tips for Couples Who Want to Hug at the End of the Renovation

✔ Plan deeply before starting – Write down all your wants and concerns before you begin to avoid surprises later.

✔ Set realistic timelines – Factor in possible delays and don’t fall for too-good-to-be-true shortcuts.

✔ Stick to a clear budget – Any changes after planning will cost more.

✔ Choose your team wisely – Check reviews, visit past projects, and don’t go for the lowest bid.

✔ Keep communication open – Agree on a “safe word” to stop arguments before they escalate.

Bottom Line: Can You Renovate and Stay in Love?

“Despite the myth, not a single couple I’ve worked with has broken up during a renovation—on the contrary, many came out even stronger,” Maya concludes. “With the right process, transparency, and open communication, you can turn this challenging period into something positive—and create a home that truly reflects both of you, inside and out.”